I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I deserve this hangover.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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