need another drink. this is the easiest way
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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