He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize