Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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