I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize