Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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