I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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