Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize