Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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