You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
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You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
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You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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