You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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