she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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