He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
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