he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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