I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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