Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Randomize