Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
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There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
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I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
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