im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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