We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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