Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize