dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
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If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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