i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize