Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize