I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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