We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
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