Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
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It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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