mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
accomplished twins. life is a go
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize