Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize