Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize