Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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