I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize