you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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