i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Randomize