Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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