Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize