I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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