so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
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Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
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I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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