After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
do herpes really smell.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I currently don't understand fingers.
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