I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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