He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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