What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
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She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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