I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize