It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
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i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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