Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
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I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
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The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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