Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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