we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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