she woke up with a sticky ear
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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