I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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