I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize