So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
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At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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